WTF is this?

There’s something alluring about
losing yourself in thought

I did that once, and found myself
falling in love
as dangerous and as reckless as it is
today my heart felt like pouring itself
filling an ocean of emotions

As I sat on the shore, seeing the space
in front of me fill itself with my feelings
I felt my color returning, my skin reacting
my heart has fallen
for life, for her, for him, for it
my heart decided to drug my mind
and let go for once

Aching to ride with the rebels
to drink with the misfits
to dine with the careless
and to fall with the romantics
I decided to get up
give routine the finger
and walk out
with that satisfying mischievous smile
that I and only I
feel such elation
exposing it

I decided to swing like the olives
in a martini, in a haze of transparency
exploding with colors
as I smash from one edge of the cup
to the other

I feel all my blase emotions
relapsing, transforming, reacting
backfiring and stripping me
of things that killed me
aiming and shooting at them
with bullets of revival
bullets of excitement
that inject my muscles
with steroids
pumping them with whatever it is
that makes them human

what the f*%k is happening?
this chemical reaction
after weeks of depression
is exactly what the doctor ordered
SCREAM, yes, do it

Let it start from your toes
let your body quiver as it makes its way
to your mouth
let your corpse feel the injection of life

Wake the hell up, no one is going to do it for you
rub your eyes, make your coffee
and change your commute,
You’re not going to work today
oh no darling,

Walk in the other direction
scratch all the past out
with a permanent marker
look forward
get your pens ready
get your adrenaline rushing
let those sinful thoughts come
out to play

Light a cigarette
let the crisp cold
bite your fingers
smile, bask in the
chaos that’s you

this is going
to be
one sexy
motherF#%king
CHANGE

Hope Gangloff ride

 

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