March 21

I suck when it comes to
showing my emotions,
my heart is scared to be worn
on my sleeve

But sometimes,
I just sit there quietly
and just marvel

Marveling is a great sport
it’s been a while since one
has soaked in all the beauty
via sight

It’s Saturday night
I sat there across from her
over dinner
we were at home

I was quiet
I just marveled
You were making dinner
making sure everyone had a plate
your daughters in count
your husband at the head of the table

I was quiet
I heard how many times your name
bounced off of walls
for requests for solace
for peace, for the sake of you being there

I was quiet
I watched as you  meticulously responded
to each and every one
I marveled, again and again

I was quiet
I listened as you caught up
with 3 daughters’s lives and a husband
as your eyes poured care and as your words
sat on our shoulders like angels

I was quiet
I watched as your heart
broke with your daughter’s
and I watched as your soul soared
with happiness after the other fell in love

I was quiet
I watched as you posed as the perfect
therapist for the one who’s confused
be it in silence or in words
I took pride in knowing you
endured years of patience and sadness
and yet reveal an appeal
that angels
marvel at

I was quiet
I observed as you guided
the other down the path of adulthood

I was quiet
I wondered at the caliber
of strength you have to
endure tantrums, fights
sickness, nagging

I was quiet
and felt with you as you sat there
after everyone did
and applauded your body’s power
to do all of this
after teaching for 10 hours

I was quiet
I felt every thud your heart
beat for the husband you love
till today after almost 30 years of marriage

I was quiet
till I asked
How do you do it?
She smiled back
effacing all sense
of exhaustion
she smiled and
marveled back
at the pieces of her
around that table
and said
I am a mother
silencing all sense
of questioning

Iris Schwarz mother

Iris Schwarz

 

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