Surface

You had that skin
it thickened with time
it was soft at birth
spurring jealousy
among the elderly

It was pale and naive
Attracting them with such ease
it was aching to be touched
it was luring them with no stop
ever abrupt

It had goosebumps
from a smile and warmth
from hugs, it was traced with nerves
that ignited from the slightest touch

It carried you through tanned summers
and cold winters, it protected you
from acid rain and coated your heart
with a thin layer of nerves, naive nerves .. again

The clock ticked
You were still being elevated
through the strata of life
thorns piercing your skin
experiences clawing at it
love sadistically enjoying it
and your skin, it slowly adapting
the way nature intended it to

slowly morphing from its birth state
slowly aging beautifully
forming creases of stories
slowly thickening
slowly filtering the real
from the fairytales

You realize your slowly shedding
that phase of innocence, purity
your skin is slowly
morphing, beautifying
the scratching claws
are literally removing pieces of your flesh
uncovering the glow within
that you so stupidly hid
for fear of social acceptation

You’re reaching the surface
scratched, tattooed,
pierced, scarred, and sometimes
even pulled down

You’re floating
exposing the most beautiful
parts of you
You’re floating to the surface
with naked
confidence

float 2

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Canvas

I am not sure
how to jot down
the surrounding
ideas that swim in my brain

they are not ideas per say
they seem to have a direct link
to my heart

I am truly happy
am I?
the conflict
I am alive, more alive
that I have ever been

I am in love
not with anyone, I am in love
not with anything
but this natural high has taken
me places and brightened
my dull confidence

Everyone knows after a high
comes the low, I am in limbo
I am stuck on a blank slate
with no plans ahead
nor any behind me, I made sure
I threw acid on them and burned them to ashes
those past mistakes, oh silly mistakes

I am on a tabula rasa pinned
by the beating heart and keeps me going
Yet, those beats always play solo
sometimes they long for the other
to comply with every thump
sometimes it beats so well, it enjoys
its aloneness

That slate, my canvas
what should I do with you?
Should I go wild and slap colored paint streaks on you?
Should I meticulously create my future?
Should I mix-n-match a messy creation and
then watch it burn?
Is this liberating or just confusing?

I am caught between
the two extremes of the scale
I am alone and I embrace it
I am alone and I dissecting every
layer that has covered me and hid me away
from my true being

Thick impermeable layers that I
inflicted on myself to please others
Give me the damn scalpel, I feel my inner bright rays
aching to shine, to expose themselves
As I make an incision, I felt lighter
I felt better, those dark layers
fell one by one, day by day
I am naked, I am comfortable
in my own skin
I am naked
and my heart
beats by itself
for
itself

NUDE

NUDE